Just when you are trying to lose weight and pacing up on good eating habits, you will encounter people who are just there to get you off the discipline. It’s really common to hear temptations such as ‘‘What happened! You always loved my cooking.’’ or “C’mon just try one. I made your favorite Muffins.’’ If these sound familiar, you are most probably dealing with diet saboteurs.
It may feel like everybody – your friends, colleagues, and even family members – is working against you when you’re trying to lose weight. But you know what? You are not the only one to feel this way!
- An astonishing number of women (more than 75%) claim that they don’t or barely receive any support from their family or friends when trying to lose weight.
- Also, in a 2017 study conducted by North Carolina State University, researchers interviewed 40 participants. All of them said they had one person in their lives that is undermining their weight loss goals.
Diet saboteurs are one of the biggest reasons why many people fail in their weight loss diets. In the following piece, we will be discussing diet saboteurs and how to prevent their negativity from getting into you. Let’s get started.
Your Dearest Friends Might be Your Bbiggest Enemies
We often receive emails from clients sharing the demotivating, hurtful comments they get during their weight loss journey. And most times, these damaging remarks don’t come from strangers but from people closest to them – say partners, friends, and parents.
To show that you aren’t the only one experiencing this, we have compiled below a list of the top diet damaging comments our clients get:
- You won’t be having salad again today, will you?
- I prepared it solely for you; you are not having any of it?
- So, you won’t go out to drink with us? Maybe we should stop inviting you.
- You’re incredibly boring when you are on a diet.
- I made your favorite salad today; won’t you be having any? Come on, don’t be rude.
- You can eat a small slice, can’t you?
- Why can’t you just “cheat” today?
- We are on vacation. Please don’t ruin everybody else’s fun.
- I wouldn’t give away your larger clothes just yet.
And what’s probably the most damaging comment of them all… - I know you’re on a diet, but I can’t really tell you are losing weight. Are you sure it’s worth it?
You probably cringed going through those comments, didn’t you? Some of them are just harmful and demoralizing. And those are only the common ones! We could list about 30 or even more.
But why are those you care about the same people undermining your weight loss efforts?
Why Do Friends Sabotage Your Weight-Loss Goals?
A survey carried out by Nakd Wholesales found that when trying to lose weight, your friends will deliberately set diet traps, invite you to a night out of dinner and drinks, and try to get you off the weight-loss track with pizza, cookies, and bagels.
But why?
To mention a few reasons: it is due to jealousy, insecurity, guilt, and even selfishness. It may also be because they feel that you are judging them, and they feel bad that they are not doing anything.
No matter what the reason is, the fact is: whenever you are trying to make a change, you should be ready to dodge stones thrown at you.
To handle people trying to sabotage your diet, you need to have some strategies and support you can rely on.
Six Good Ways to Foil Diet Saboteurs
1. Explain the Reason Behind Your Decision to Lose Weight Before You Begin
Have you ever informed your partner you are commencing a diet only for them to come home with your favorite ice cream the following night?
But, have you tried explaining the reason why you are looking to get in shape?
2. Turn Your Diet Saboteurs Into Supporters
Rather than saying, “I will be starting a diet on Tuesday,” explain the reason why you have decided to make that change. Say something like:
- I wish to have more self-confidence.
- I don’t feel good. I always feel tired and feel ten years older than I am.
- I don’t feel like I have control over what I eat
- I want to set a good example for my kid and take care of myself, so I am around for them.
Let them know what your main reason is. When your partner and friends understand why you’re trying to shed weight and what it means to you, they are more likely to motivate you and help ensure you stay on track.
3. Say “Thank you, but…”
Those you love may choose to derail your diet for many reasons. But many times, they are not trying to undermine your efforts at all.
Food is just one of the ways people show love. For example, if your grandma made you your favorite dish, she’s probably not trying to sabotage your diet. She knows you like it and just wants to make you happy.
So what should you do?
You could give in a little, right? We don’t advise this approach because you’ll keep fighting this battle once you start to teeter.
What you need to do is:
- Commend their effort and
- Tell them you are not feeling hungry right now.
Here’s an example of what to say when your family expresses their love with food.
“I know you worked so hard to make this, and I sincerely appreciate it! Oh! I love you so much too. But I’m not feeling hungry right now.”
Your grandma, partner, and that cute colleague at work are only trying to do something for you and want you to acknowledge their efforts. You should just commend them AND adhere to your diet.
4. Acknowledge Your Situation to Your Loved Ones
For women, dealing with these diet saboteurs feels more difficult as they tend to take things more personally as well as emotionally. It is sometimes harder for women to stick in their heels and say, ‘No honey, I am not going to drink every day anymore.'”
Let’s be honest, we live in a society where we turn a cold-shoulder to obesity, even though many people are obese. This rather makes us reluctant to discuss the issue more openly.
The way to deal with such a situation is to acknowledge it.
Say, “Mom, I know I’ve put up weight. Not that it makes me a bad person, but I will need your help to get back in shape. When I come over, please cook more veggies or lean meat.”
To your husband, say right out: “Dear, I love you. We have been together for 10 years and I’m not going anywhere. You are my best friend and I need you by my side on this journey.”
Tell your colleagues, “I am still the same person I was, but I am carrying extra body weight and need to get rid of it. I won’t make it if you don’t help.”
5. Create Your Support Team
In an ideal world, everybody supports you. Your friends join you on lunch-time walks, your family likes the “healthy” meals you are preparing, and your partner is your best buddy at the gym.
Sadly, that is not how it always is. So, you have got two options:
(1) You hope for the best (this is not a good strategy) or (2) You build a team of supporters
Think of cultivating healthy habits as a tug-of-war game.
- You are on one side – standing alone, feet dug deep into the ground, fighting for each inch.
- On the opposite side are those trying to sabotage your diet. But unlike you, the saboteurs are not struggling. They are not even sweating at all.
It’s a battle of you against your spouse who is always coming home with fried chicken, work colleagues that are inviting you to dinner, and friends tempting you with a cold bottle of French wine and desserts.
With a lot of people on the opposite side, it seems impossible to win, right? That is the reason why you should try to make the odds even by recruiting people to pull on your side.
- Do you have a work colleague that likes yoga? Good!
- Do you have a neighbor that likes to take an evening walk? Excellent!
- A friend that recently signed up at the gym? Perfect!
- Are you working with a coach that you can text at any time? Fantastic!
These are the kind of people you need to make things balance. Don’t ever underestimate the role supportive friends and family can have on your decisions.
Keep your supportive friends close and your enemies at a distance.
Michael Corleone says, “Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.” But while this may be great advice if you are a boss in the underworld, you want to stay far away from diet saboteurs when you’re trying for weight loss.
Aside from surrounding yourself with a support team, you also have to avoid people who are not on the same page with you regarding fitness.
Let’s say your friends want you to go out with them for a drink, but they always force you to overeat and stay out late. Since you know how the night would end, why not stay out of it?
Note: it is easier to avoid the dragon than to kill it.
We know that the goal is to lose weight and not to become a recluse in the process. You can still go out with friends, but be watchful for challenging situations that make change difficult, and then take control of it.
6. Hire a Coach!
It’s hard to find supportive friends, stop your family from tempting you with food, and stay away from constant social pressure. That’s precisely why you need a person on your side.
There are many reasons to work with a coach. A diet coach can give you valuable advice and help you navigate the most difficult situations.
If you find it difficult to stay motivated, want someone that will support you, and need a professional to ensure you don’t go off track, you need to get yourself a diet coach.
To learn more about how BioIntelligent Wellness’s coaches can help you stay on track, fend off diet saboteurs, and reach your goals, contact us for a free 15-minute virtual consultation.
