Whether it occurs online or in person, bullying and shaming can be very painful and damaging. Sometimes, it feels like there’s no “ideal” way to look: obese and even healthy weight people are often fat-shamed, while those trying to lose weight are shamed for choosing to eat a certain way.
So, how do you handle people who shame you because of your body size or efforts to become healthier?
To begin with, let’s clarify what shame and shaming are
Shame is what you feel when you have done something wrong, and shaming is the act of making another person feel bad about themselves or something they are doing. Regardless of your shoe size or weight, you haven’t done anything “wrong,” – so there’s no reason to be ashamed.
Aside from being inherently cruel, fat-shaming affects how people treat those who are overweight or obese. One of the common causes of fat-shaming is the false belief that people with extra weight are lazy or not trying hard enough to lose weight.
Shut down anyone who tries to shame you or anyone you love for being overweight or obese!
You can ignore them or hold them accountable and let them know their comments or actions hurt.
Diet shaming
On the other hand, Diet Shaming is a shaming aimed at those who are committed to healthier activities such as:
- Physical fitness
- Weight loss
- Weight management or
- Healthy eating.
Why would people do that!
Some of the people who diet shame do so because they don’t want you to succeed with your weight loss, while some are just envious of your devotion, hard work, and success. This can go a long way as many even actively try to sabotage your diet restriction (diet saboteurs).
Others might not even know that they are hurting you with their words.
For example, a jealous shamer might say,
“I would rather die than cut carbs from my diet”
While a naysayer may say something like,
“You are never going to lose weight”
OR
“your other diets failed, why do you think this one will work.”
These remarks can be very hurtful, especially if you find it difficult to lose weight or remain committed.
Why is shaming harmful?
There are many who advocate that fat-shaming can help motivate one to improve. However, fat-shaming someone is a rather counterproductive factor to lose weight.
Many studies have shown that fat humiliation contributes to stress and leads overweight people to consume more calories. A 2019 study published in Pediatric Obesity found that teasing/bullying kids about their weight is associated with increased weight gain well into adulthood.
Another study of 93 women showed weight-stigmatizing made overweight women eat more calories and feel less in control of their food choice. Research has also revealed that disgracing overweight people contributes to increased body dissatisfaction, which in turn raises unhealthy coping mechanisms like binge eating – a vicious toxic cycle.
Body shame even leads to increased levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which can stimulate appetite, and increase the risk for depression and anxiety – both attributed to unhealthy eating habits.
How to deal with diet and fat-shaming
To deal with diet shaming, you need to focus on why you intend to lose weight, adopt healthier lifestyles, commit again, and keep going forward.
If you like, you may let potential shamers know your motivators or pay them no attention and focus on yourself.
Posting positive quotes that remind you of your motivators like, “I want to walk more comfortably, or I want to travel more,” around your home and office are great ideas. These reminders will help you to shut down would-be shamers and motivate you to keep up your efforts. And when you have actualized your health and weight-loss goals, you may confront those diet shamers who are simply jealous of your success.
Food shaming is said to occur when individuals, whether well-meaning or not, find faults with or question your portion size, nutrition, or types of food you eat. Whenever you meet with a food or diet shamer, think about how much you have achieved and remind yourself why you wanted to lose weight.
It may also be necessary to directly address this type of commentary with a broad statement such as “my food choices are not up for discussion, thank you.”
Take away
Regardless of the type of shamer you meet, you need to remember that your weight, health, and well-being are very personal. Whether you are trying to lose weight, have already lost weight, or are naturally slim, the key to handling food or diet shamers is to focus on your motivations and body positivity.
Ignore people who think they have the right to comment on your eating habits or body size.
There’s no need to explain yourself to others. You have chosen to commit to your weight loss journey, and that’s that.
If you have committed to a healthier life, the next thing to do is to develop a nutritional food habit that is sustainable in the long run. BioIntelligent Wellness is right by your side and offers all necessary resources, guidance, and education to help you achieve your goals. Schedule a complimentary consultation with our nutrition experts.
